Potential Pitfalls: While their differences can be balancing, they can also be a source of frustration. This is very balancing for the more avoidant Type 9. Type 4s add emotional electricity to the house ensuring issues get discussed and important topics aren’t swept under the rug. Type 4s bring rich expressiveness and intensity to the dynamic, helping to wake up the Type 9 and adding color to the dynamic. They don’t get blown off course by the emotional storms of their Type 4, and this is very grounding for their partner. Type 9s are steady, reliable, solid, dependable, inclusive and accepting. The foundation of this pair is a combination of support and personal freedom to pursue their own goals and interests while enjoying the shared harmony they create together. What’s Great: This can be an accepting, soothing match with a deep enjoyment from shared time together. Type 8s need to experience the limits of ignoring the world of relationships and emotions. Type 8s need to respect their Type 2's orientation towards feelings and emotions. Type 8s lose respect for their Type 2 seeing them as weak, manipulative and creating unnecessary dependencies with others.īack in balance: Type 2s need to deeply connect with their Type 8's fear of being vulnerable and the accompanying aggression to hide vulnerability. Type 2s see their Type 8 as hard-hearted, confrontational, cold and self-centered. This difference manifests as dramatically different interpersonal styles. Type 8s value the tangible, practical world more highly, and in lower levels of awareness, they can have a casual disregard for the emotional world. Type 2s place great importance on feelings, relationships and emotional responses. Potential Pitfalls: Type 2s and Type 8s value the emotional world differently and have very different communication styles. This can be an effective, supportive couple with clearly defined roles who accommodate each other’s blind spots and accentuate each other’s strengths. They have few or no issues with personal boundaries, and Type 2s can learn a lot from watching their Type 8 partner. They balance out the Type 2’s softness and make sure concrete priorities get done. Type 8s are hardened, practical and results-oriented. They can reach emotionally remote people, an important trait in breaking through the Type 8’s tough emotional armor. They value emotions and can identify, discuss and process their feelings and the feelings of others. Type 2s are more connected to the emotional world. What’s great: This combination can have an archetypical flavor with the Type 8 embodying many of the traditional masculine traits, and the Type 2 embodying the more feminine traits. Why? Type 8 men with Type 2 women follow the typical gender roles in most cultures: the power-focused, protective, emotionally-guarded man with the relationship-focused, emotionally expressive, more intuitive woman. This couple is seen almost five times more frequently than the average. The most common couple in the Enneagram is Type 8 men with Type 2 women. This study focused on married straight couples so unfortunately, it doesn’t include gay, bisexual or transgender individuals – we’ll look for that data in future research. We should say that Type 1 women often choose Type 5 men. Men and women choose their Enneagram partners differently so we shouldn’t say Type 5s and Type 1s go together. This isn’t to say these are the happiest couples, but rather these types pair up more often than the rest. After people learn their Enneagram type, the next question they invariably ask is “What types go well together?” That’s a whole different topic, but today we’ll explore the four Enneagram types who are seen together the most frequently.īased on a 457-couple survey, these four pairs stood out with the highest statistical frequency.
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